This post is part of a series on bravery I started a couple months ago…you can read earlier bravery posts here. Also, warning, this one gets a little more introspective and meandering than most.
How is this the first time I’ve talked about Aragorn on this blog?
Have you ever had a book-slash-movie people repeatedly told you to read-slash-see but you just didn’t get it done for the longest time?
I was that way with Lord of the Rings. I swear I was one of maybe four people left in the world who hadn’t seen it by the time I finally watched it. And the only reason I even did watch it was because my dad said I might like it. If my dad suggests something, I tend to listen.
So I watched it. And the second Aragorn walked onto the screen I mentally squealed and kicked myself for waiting so long to see it.
Little tangent here because I can’t help it and because if you ever doubted my geek cred, you won’t after this:
I was soooo into Aragorn for about a brief six-month period that I had notebooks and posters and everything with his face on them. IN FACT, the guy I was dating at the time even gave me a couple Aragorn gifts and once bought me a copy of GQ with Viggo Mortensen on the cover. Which, I don’t know, possibly should’ve been a sign things were a little off in the relationship. Especially considering the article inside the mag was actually about Hidalgo not Lord of the Rings. (Come on!) Speaking of which, no movie has ever made me appreciate Chapstick more than Hidalgo.
Don’t let the old-school cover fool you. This is a timeless and perfect story.
Phew, sorry, back on track now and the point of all this is that last week I read a book that had that same “how could I have possibly waited so long?!” effect on me. The book?
The Blue Castle by L.M. Montgomery
Here’s the spot where I pause to profusely thank Rachel McMillan for urging me for over a year to read it. THANK YOU, Rach!*
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There are about a hundred lines in The Blue Castle that made me smile. It’s full of wit and droll humor. I adored so much about it.
But the lines that stood out most were near the beginning of the book. As soon as I read them, I underlined them and thought, blog post! Here they are:
Fear is the original sin. Almost all of the evil in the world has its origin in the fact that some one is afraid of something.
I thought about those lines for days. Am thinking still. I agree. I disagree. Is fear the sin or what we do with it? Aren’t some of the bravest actions those taken when we’re afraid. If we don’t have fear, can we really have courage? Then again, how many times do angels in the Bible say “fear not?” Maybe there are different kinds of fear…
These are the thoughts and questions that’ve been ping-ponging around in my brain for the past week. Then, the other day, I read this quote in a book called Love, Skip, Jump by Shelene Bryan.
The fact is, every significant event that happened in the Bible happened because somebody said yes to God.
The quote immediately jumped out at me…partially, I think, because the syntax is so similar to the quote I’d been mentally carrying around for days.
Almost all of the evil in the world…some one is afraid of something.
Every significant event in the Bible…somebody said yes to God.
And it makes me think, how many acts of bravery happen because someone who was afraid said yes to God anyway?
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Confession: One second after I read that quote about saying yes to God, I thought, Yeah, seriously, for real. Three seconds after I read that quote about saying yes to God, I thought, Well, that’s great if you know what he’s asking you to say yes to.
Maybe a person shouldn’t get snarky during her early morning quiet time or if she does, maybe she shouldn’t admit it. But I did and I am.
I got snarky and then I got stressed. Because lately life has felt so full and fast-paced that if God did ask me to say yes to something, I don’t know how I’d hear him. And time is going too fast. And what if I’m missing out? What if I’m saying no and I don’t even realize it? What if I’m saying yes to the wrong things?
Here’s one of a bajillion great things about God: his whisper is louder and more persistent than the frenetic pace of my now-and-then overwrought and possibly very silly bouts of restless unease. And this is what I think he might’ve begun whispering that morning earlier this week:
Maybe it’s not about whether I want you to quit your job or keep going.
Stay put or move away.
Maybe it’s not WHAT you need to say yes to. But WHO.
Stop overthinking it. Stop fearing what you might be missing.
Just say yes to me.
And go out and live the day. And live it well.
And perhaps there’s bravery in that. One of the definitions of the word “brave” is “making a fine appearance.”
I want to make a fine appearance! To say yes to God and mean it…to turn away from whatever fear might crouch in nagging uncertainties…and to live today well.
Like how Aragorn would live it if he were real. (Sorry, couldn’t resist.)
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What do you think it looks like to say yes to God? Have you ever said “yes” while afraid?
*I could gush about The Blue Castle for a good long time, but there’s no need to do that because Rachel has a special BC post going up on our friend Hillary Manton Lodge‘s blog soon…watch for it. Methinks it will be awesome.
Comments 12
This hits so close to home because I was just in the process of saying “yes” to God about something but in total fear if he fulfilled that yes because I had no idea how I’d have the time to do it! His whispers in the middle of my fretting were so similar “it’s about saying yes to ME. Let me handle the rest!” And in the end, while I said “yes” to him and had a willing heart, he closed the door so I didn’t have to walk through it. But what he worked in me through the process was priceless!
Great post, Melissa:)
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Love that story, Susan, and it seems like maybe it’s often the case that it’s the process of saying yes that’s the game-changer rather than whatever it is we’re saying yes to. Love it!
Melissa, I loved this! I think the thing we tend to forget about saying “yes” to God is we best follow through. I also think we can say yes, but forget we have to yield first, and then SUBMIT. All the good intentions in the world don’t mean much if our hearts aren’t right first. Does that make sense?
And then there is this other side of the coin…like you said. Saying “yes,” and meaning it, but fearing it, too. Trying to work on that one! 🙂
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Follow-through…yes, that’s important. And having a heart that’s in the right place. And meaning our yesses. (Yesses…is that a word??) Great thoughts!
Golly gosh, Batgirl (I grew up watching the Adam West Batman series) – this is a fabulous post.
I’m prone to anxiety and a friend of mine who is a fellow anxious type said something very profound recently: “it’s when we wobble we get anxious”. Yes, when we do nothing hoping the ‘thing’ will disappear or take one step forward & 1/2 a step back, our anxiety increases. I wobble all the time because I’m not sure if taking that step is the best one or whether God really wants me to, blah, blah, blah.
This also speaks to faith: take a firm step forward and God steps with us. If we take a step forward & 1/2 step back, it’s like God bumps into us.
I loved this quote from Ann Voskamp when she was talking about Abraham:
“God didn’t give Abraham a map — He gave Abraham a relationship. He doesn’t want you to lean on a guidebook. God wants you to lean on the Guide — who speaks to you through His Book. Why would God give a map — when He wants to give you Himself?”
Yes, God wants more of us. And spending time in His Presence is the best step we can take everyday.
Yes, I’m rambling again, sorry, Melissa. But love the wisdom you gained (and shared with us) from your searching and admiration of Aragorn.
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Thanks so much, Ian–I really appreciate your rambling. 🙂 And my brother watched the Adam West Batman reruns ALL the time growing up…I have certain episodes practically memorized.
“Why would God give a map when He wants to give you Himself?” I love that! And wobbling…man, I get that. It’s so easy to get stuck in a place of indecision or inaction out of fear that we’re not hearing God or we’re hearing him wrong or we’re just not sure what step, if any, to take.
But I love what you said about how spending time with God is the best step we can take every day. I love it. Because when we don’t know what comes next or what decision we’re supposed to be making or what we’re possibly supposed to say yes to, we can ALWAYS know it’s the right and best thing to seek God.
Confession: I’m snarky too. God probably just ignores that part of my prayers. At least, I hope He does, because I’m snarky a lot.
I used to think saying “yes” to God looked like the missionaries overseas and I still think that, but I also think there are other examples we tend to overlook. Like praying for someone who is antagonistic towards you and your faith. Or going out of your way to help someone. Or talking to someone about Him when you may normally stay quiet. God is in every aspect of our lives, not just the big stuff.
I’ve actually been struggling with pretty much all of the questions you mentioned. I’m so afraid of doing the wrong thing, or stepping in the wrong direction that I have no idea what to do. Fear is my enemy right now, because I’m second guessing every decision and possibly holding back from saying “yes” to something the Lord has for me. But I’m so afraid of being wrong and making a mistake, I’m not willing to step forward and find out. I don’t know where to go from here, but I’m also so busy that I haven’t taken the time to talk with God and learn what He wants for me. Whenever I try to, I fall asleep and wake up feeling awful that I didn’t manage to hear from Him.
So, yeah. My spiritual life needs a major confidence and time boost.
I’m going to leave you alone now, since I’m about to fall alsleep typing this.
Hope you have a great weekend!
~Sarah
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Whoa, Sarah, we are in such a similar place. When you said this, my eyes actually widened because it’s exactly how I’ve felt lately: “But I’m so afraid of being wrong and making a mistake, I’m not willing to step forward and find out. I don’t know where to go from here, but I’m also so busy that I haven’t taken the time to talk with God and learn what He wants for me.” That is SO me. So I guess we can take comfort that we’re not alone. 🙂
But seriously, I hear you…and I love that you were able to share those thought and that this ongoing bravery conversation is sparking reflection on all our parts. And please definitely know you’re not alone in feeling like your spiritual life needs a confidence and time boost! If you read Ian’s comment above, he mentions that spending time in God’s presence is the best step we can always take…and I love that…even when we don’t know what other steps we’re supposed to be taking, we can be confident of that one.
Hope you have a great weekend, too. 🙂
Thanks for bringing back your awesome series, Melissa. It’s so poignant and determined to ask tough questions, and I just have to say, thank you for that! 🙂
On another note, heavens, do I ever need to read ‘The Blue Castle.’ It just keeps sounding better and better. Lucky I have a copy.
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Thanks, Rissi! The tough questions are making me think…and in a good way. It’s almost easy to write an introspective post that asks questions, but this series is sort of forcing me to not just ask questions but act on what I feel like God’s teaching me. It’s challenging…but cool. And also very different for me, since in the past I didn’t let myself get quite as transparent in blog posts!
And oh yes, The Blue Castle is soooo good. I really loved it.
I love this post for so many reasons, but most of all because I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about bravery lately. Thank you for sharing, Melissa! 🙂
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Thanks, Rachelle. Bravery is one of those topics that sounds kind of intangible or theoretical or something…but doing this series is helping me make it a real thing in my life. So it’s been good for me. 🙂