So, I was delighted to come across Tessa Afshar‘s Pearl in the Sand. And now she has a new book out, Harvest of Rubies.
And what’s really, really exciting: she’s here today and she’s continuing our theme of friendship. I hope you enjoy her post, leave a comment and definitely check out her books!!
A friend’s love…
The heroine of my latest novel, Harvest of Rubies, is a brilliant scholar—a Jew in ancient Persia who becomes senior scribe to the queen. Sarah’s problem is that she is better with languages and accounts than she is with people. Her relationships remain shallow as her career catapults her into the center of palace intrigue and power. Sarah believes that her achievements are the measure of her worth. She thinks that apart from her talent she has little else to offer others, a notion that drives her to cling to her work with an unhealthy desperation. And then, she loses her job.
Have you ever lost a job you love? It’s never pleasant. But for Sarah, the loss hits a core place. She is her job. And suddenly, alone and abandoned, she becomes a nobody. Her whole identity is taken from her. Sarah dips head first into a profound depression.
Until friendship saves her. A maid, a gardener, a cook, and a dog teach Sarah that there is more to her than what she is able to accomplish. Reflected in their eyes she begins to see a picture of her true self. She describes this journey of discovery in her own words: “In the background of my mind was planted the inconceivable idea that my very presence—not what I could do or how I might serve—but my mere being might be a joy to another.”
In other words, Sarah begins to reclaim her true self when she begins to understand friendship.
We were created for community. Adam already had the community of God himself as well as all the creatures of Eden when God proclaimed that it was not good for Him to be alone. We need our own kind to become the fullness of ourselves.
I know that to a large degree I owe my own growth as a woman and as a Christian to my close friendships. My best friend and I speak almost everyday. There is nothing I hide from her because I know she is worthy of my trust. And because I also know that God says, “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” (James 5:16)
I am not perfect. I would like to be. But I’m not. In friendship, what I have learned is that even my imperfect self is lovable. Worthy of honor. And a blessing.
Tessa Afshar was voted “New Author of the Year” by the Family Fiction sponsored Reader’s Choice Awards 2011 for her novel Pearl in the Sand. She was born in Iran to a nominally Muslim family, and lived there for the first fourteen years of her life. She moved to England where she survived boarding school for girls and fell in love with Jane Austen and Charlotte Bronte, before moving to the United States permanently. Her conversion to Christianity in her twenties changed the course of her life forever. Tessa holds an MDiv from Yale University where she served as cochair of the Evangelical Fellowship at the Divinity School. She has spent the last thirteen years in full-time Christian work.
Comments 30
“Being loved, cherished, claimed, even though you are sometimes a pain.”
LOVE THIS! Because, quite frankly, I know that can be me:) And it is the ultimate security to know I am loved regardless!
Great to meet you Tessa–your book sounds wonderful and so full of truth. It is way too easy to wrap our worth in what we do…
Melissa – hope you had a wonderful time last week and a great weekend!
“It is way to easy to wrap our worth in what we do.” Amen to that, Susan. That seems to be the constant struggle of my emotional life. 🙂
Hi Susan. Guess what? That can be me too! I think when you have a bad day – when you show up at your worst – it’s the loving acceptance of others that blocks shame and self-condemnation and leads you right into the grace of God.
Cheers.
“If you want to heal your soul, you have to learn to share everything about yourself with another. Share until the light overcomes the darkness that clogs your inmost being when you keep your fears and wounds hidden from others.” Loved this!
I have a friend like yours and it’s priceless! Wonderful post today, ladies!
Tessa, your books have beautiful covers!
Umm…the sharing everything about yourself part scares me a little. But I know vulnerability with the right people is so important. (But do I have to tell them everything?!?!)
I agree – such beautiful book covers! And great stories inside!
Jessica, it’s wonderful that you have such a friend. I think vulnerability resembles weight-lifting in a way: it isn’t so hard when you practice it daily – with the right person. Having said that, I still have moments when I say, “Jesus, do I have to say that? Even that? Dang!”
So glad you loved the covers, ladies. I had little to do with that, except for a lot of prayer.
I just read about this somewhere else too. I love her covers and think the stories sound interesting!
Definitely check ’em out. So good!!
Tessa Afshar’s novel sounds like a book I’d enjoy. Tessa Afshar’s life is like one I’d love to read about when God leads her to write her story. Tessa Afshar seems like a woman I’d love to know.
Melissa, Thanks for introducing me to a new writer.
You’re welcome, Roxanne. 🙂
This post has so many truths. As one who sometimes falls into the trap of believing my worth is in what I do, this is a good reminder that it’s not! And I have one of those wonderful friends that I can and have confided anything in. The book sounds intriguing.
I fall into the same trap, Pat…way too often…thankful for posts like this that remind of the truth.
Great post, Tessa! I loved the part about allowing ourselves to believe that we’re wanted/loved even if we aren’t perfect. So true!
That stood out to me, too, Stacy!
Beautiful post! I’ve grown more in my Christian walk in the last several years because God has put me in a place where I can develop these kinds of friendships. Iron sharpens iron!
Love that, Melissa…friendships that encourage our walk with Christ!
So true, Mellissa!
I can so identify with the heroine in this book. I went from successful business woman, to newbie writer and back to student trying to make the “A” grades. Talk about having to re-evaluate who I am!
Thanks so much for sharing!
And don’t forget the best MBT hostess who ever existed, Alena!! 🙂
Alena, King David went through a lot of shifts in his job description too. Musician. Warrior. Mercenary. Poet. But it all made for a better king. And a better man of God. I know God has a very special plan for you. And feel free to get a B once in a while!
All the best.
I’ve had so many friends who accept me, flaws and all. If I had to worry about being perfect around them all the time, I don’t think our friendships would be what they’re meant to.
Yes, yes, thank you, Lord, for friends who don’t expect perfection!!
I love how this post delved into the riches of friendship — the inexpressible value of being known by another person. It’s tragic to think what I “do” equals who I “am.” Yep, I’ve embraced that lie — and have slowly learned to release it. True, refreshing friendships? The antidote.
I hear you, Beth…the tragedy of equating what we do with who we are. And yet, like you said, it’s so easy for me to embrace that lie. I love family and friends–like you!–who so continually affirm who I am!
“We need our own kind to become the fullness of ourselves.” I want to paint this on my writing room wall! Since discovering this amazing blogging world full of Christian authors, I feel like I am coming into the fullness of my writing self. I can’t wait to meet everyone in person.
Tessa, your words are beautiful and insightful – I loved reading what you wrote today. Thank you for sharing with us, and Melissa, thank you so much for rolling out the welcome mat every Wednesday. I can’t wait to meet next weeks guest!
I love that same thing about the blogging world, Gabrielle – getting to know so many other writers/readers who encourage us as friends and fellow writers. 🙂
Gabrielle, it’s a profound thing to be “coming into the fullness” of your writing self. I pray the Lord will fulfill your destiny. How amazing that this new genre of blogging (which Melissa does incredibly well) could have such an impact.
Great post Melissa and Tessa,
Hey Melis…remember what we were doing at this time last week? 🙂
How many states did we drive through?
Are we still friends?
Love ya! mom
Yes! I remember…we were driving through six or seven states (I still don’t really know), and I was being very boring. I’m sorry I was so tired!!! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve thought of that in the past week and felt bad…because when is the next time we’ll spend 15 hours in a car together? And I was all narcoleptic and boring!
And yes, we’re still friends. Always!
Thanks Melissa and Tessa for sharing. I am super excited about reading all of Tessa’s books. This post spoke to me because the Lord has led me to write a book about myself (I know,that has never been done before!)to lend a spiritual hand up to those who are down and going through dark times in their lives. This was a big thing for me bc at first I did not want to expose my horrors and weaknesses to the world fearing that I would be ashamed and humiliated by people. What the Lord has shown me however is that by showing my frailties to the world the Lords strength is being revealed as I paint a picture of a Sovereign God full of love and mercy who has directed my paths. The awesome result of putting this on paper is that I am healing in areas of my life that I did not know was even there! Friendships are truly invaluable and I pray that many more will be made through sharing my story someday.