February 22, 2012
It was just a normal day and I was just doing a normal thing–procrastinating by way of checking my email. Only there was something unexpected waiting for me in my inbox. An email from an acquisitions editor at Bethany House Publishers telling me she’d followed my blog for some time and kept up with me on Twitter and would be interested in seeing some of my writing.
And my heart and lungs started doing some sort of duo-gymnastics routine. Like, for real.
After I’d steadied my internal organs and Googled this editor to make sure she was legit and called my mom and guzzled a can of Diet Coke with Lime and waited what seemed like an appropriate amount of time so the editor wouldn’t think I was one of those people who had nothing better to do than check my email constantly, I emailed her back. Here’s what I wanted to write:
Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, are you for REAL? Yes, I’d love to send you a proposal. The first adult novel I ever read as a kid was Love Comes Softly by Janette Oke published by Bethany House and no joke, from the point on, I started telling people that one day I wanted to be published by Bethany House and now I get this email and I’m DYING in a totally good way!
Here’s what I actually wrote:
Wow, thank you so much for the email…and for stopping by my website…and for giving me the opportunity to send you a proposal. I’m so grateful…and surprised! Oh, and I’m following you now on Twitter. 🙂
I would love to send you a proposal!
I’ve attached a proposal, including a synopsis and sample chapters, for my most recent WIP entitled From the Ground Up. I’m nearly done with final revisions on this novel. It’s a 90,000 word contemporary romance about a homebuilding TV show host juggling a fake husband, former fiance and nosy reporter all while trying to save her show.
The email went on from there, describing another book I’d written. I actually ended up sending her two proposals and eventually the accompanying manuscripts as well. The other book still hasn’t seen the light of day, but that first one I mentioned, From the Ground Up, went on to become my first published novel–retitled Made to Last and released September 2013.
And I’m indescribably grateful.
*****
So here’s something funny: I had this whole, long, emotional post written for today about what that email on February 22, 2012 taught me. Because it did teach me some things…about dreams and timing and about how God sometimes opens doors we totally didn’t see coming. About living in the tension of a wait and using that time well and being prepared for the eventual flung-open door. It was beginning to turn into a spiritually hefty post.
But then I stopped. And thought.
What about the person who keeps running into closed doors?
What about when the wait goes on…and on…and on?
What about my own still unfulfilled dreams?
Do we really need pithy little lessons in those times?
What about when an anniversary isn’t a good one…but instead a reminder of a loved one’s death…a broken relationship…a horrifying diagnosis…a dream seemingly lost for good?
What about then? Does one person’s great experience and the personal lessons it taught really help then?
Maybe sometimes in some cases, but probably not always. In fact, I’m not so convinced it’s even fair to look at my own life and say “God did it this way for me, so here’s the spiritual moral of the story for all of us.”
Instead, as I wrote that previous post and then felt that weird nudge in my spirit and went on to delete it, it hit me: We can look for lessons. We can ponder God’s patterns. We can try to come up with expectations based on our experiences.
But there’s something almost breathtaking about also being able to say, “I’m not sure I understand what you’re doing God, but I know you love me. I know it. And I’m going to choose to trust you.”
There’s a spot in my upcoming release, Like Never Before, where my main character Logan (aka fictional love of my life) is talking to Bear (aka wise but mysterious guy who will get his own story one of these days). They’re talking about decisions and next steps and Logan is admitting his wavering faith, when Bear says this.
Sometimes believing is a matter of deciding. Deciding who you’re going to trust and what you know about who you trust.
We don’t always need lessons. But we do always need truth...we need to know some things. And that truth we need to know is that we’re loved by a God who is bigger than we can possibly imagine. The truth is that he’s trustworthy. The truth is that he never abandons us.
He loves us when we get an email out of the blue from an editor at our dream publisher and the surprise of it balloons our faith.
But he also loves us when the anniversary is a sad reminder instead of a good one.
When the dream is still in waiting mode and the tension feels overwhelming.
When our faith is wavering to the point that another trite lesson might be our undoing.
When we don’t even see him at work…he still loves us.
And when we know that–as Bear says later in that same conversation with Logan, when it “starts sinking into our bones”–it really does change everything.
Comments 31
Thanks for this post today, Melissa. It was really great!
And timely, if I were to be honest.
I’ve been feeling God pointing me towards something for a while, and now it looks like funds might be available. Also, we went to a church yesterday that when the service came around, it was talking about what God calls you to do. The last time we visited a new church, just a few weeks ago, the message was about not running from God’s call on your life, but to accept it and Go! For to long I’ve been going through Motions and not really really feeling it.
All of this random heart pouring may never be read by you or anyone else for that matter. But thank you Melissa.
Author
Oh, I love this, Heather! And I love all the ways God is whispering “Go!” to you. That’s immensely exciting!! One of the things I love about God is that he continually finds personal, individual ways to communicate with us…and if we need extra nudges, he gives them…and sometimes he flat out pushes. I hope the thing God’s point you toward comes to fruition and blows you away with its wonderfulness. 🙂
Absolutely beautiful post!!! I love it so much and there is so much truth in it. 🙂
Author
Thank you, Raechel! I’m so glad it resonated. Hope you have a wonderful week!
Thank you. You have no idea how much I needed to read this today. Dealing with some health issues and have 2 doctor’s appointments today and trying very hard to keep my head up and stay positive. This definitely helped.
Author
Elizabeth, I’m so glad this post had good timing for you. So sorry about the health issues…I hope your doctor’s appointments go well and provide both answers and peace.
Totally awesome post today! It was what, about six years ago that we met at Deep Thinkers and I knew then you’d be published one day. So proud for you and of you–this post is a perfect example of your heart.
Author
I think that was six years ago. Man, has it really been that long! And I am proud of you…what is it, ten books you’ve had contracted since then? AMAZING!! I’d love to just sit down and chat with you sometime, Pat, about all the writing and life twists and turns for both of us since then.
I’d love to sit down and talk with you as well! Yes, it’s 10 contracted books and I’m working on the 2nd book in the 2nd contract with Revell. And Kensington has asked for a proposal on a cozy mystery.
Author
You are a-ma-zing!
Hey Melissa! That was such a great post…I kinda think I would have loved it either way you wrote it, but this one hit a chord. God’s been reminding me that He still cares about the little things, and will grant seemingly small requests I don’t think He will grant. I’m also in a waiting period, and the door seems to be opening, but then it’s taking a REALLY long time to open, and I’ve been reminded lately to TRUST God…to trust His timing, and to trust that He is in control all the time, and to be absolutely completely dependent on Him, and to trust Him to the point that, as Francis Chan says: “we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn’t come through.” So thank you for sharing this post with us!
Author
There’s that word that seems to pop up ALL the time: trust. 🙂 I feel like more and more, that’s what life is about, what faith really comes down to. Trust.
So glad you liked the post, Heather. Also, let’s hang out sometime!
Melissa, I so love this post. As a yet-to-be-published author, I can appreciate everything expressed here. Mostly, though, I am grateful for your willingness to share your experience. The discernment you felt when deciding not to post your original post. Waiting for the right time. It’s so hard to hear that still voice talking to us in these small moments. To be reminded that our God is a God of all times, places, reasons, and seasons. Thank you.
Author
Hi Teresa! Thanks so much for stopping by. LOVE what you said: “Our God is a God of all times, places, reasons, and seasons.” That’s so good…and so true!
Well my mascara’s ruined by this post.
There’s been a lot of closed doors in my life the last year. Professionally and otherwise. And I’m so restless and it chafes, time after time. So much so that my faith’s tested thin and I’ve had to dial it back and reevaluate where I am placing my trust in. Or rather, WHO. Not the ideal circumstances, not even my hopes or the desires of my heart that God promises to fulfill. But GOD Himself. And this post, Melissa, was such a timely reminder of that truth and more that I really needed to hear today. Thank you. <3
Author
Haha, I’m sorry about the running mascara but SO glad this post was the reminder you needed today. I’m also sorry about the closed doors…I’ve been there. I have and it’s not fun. And it is SO hard to hold on to truth in those times. And honestly, it’s because of those times that I deleted the first post I wrote about today’s fun anniversary. Because honestly, it felt almost too light. It seemed to ignore the fact that sometimes God’s timing is HARD. Sometimes the wait stretches so long we are beyond tempted to give up. And sometimes someone else’s cute, happy stories only make those painful things harder.
But the awesome thing about truth is that it doesn’t change. And same with God’s love. And I LOVE what you said about reevaluating where you’re placing your trust…WHO you’re placing it in. It’s crazy true that it’s easy to slip into this place where our hope sorta revolves around dreams and desires and that’s when we find our hope rising and falling depending on circumstances. But when our hope is in the God who loves us, it’s just…better. 🙂
Hugs, Meghan!
Thank you so much for this, Melissa! Two weeks ago I read one of your books (From the Start) for the first time and loved it! So I was kind of like you (Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh…) when I received a copy from NetGalley of your new novel (Like Never Before).
And I have to admit both books have conversations that I will be going over in my mind and heart for a long time. One of them is the one you mentioned (but specially a conversation between L&B towards the end – I do not want to give out any spoilers, hope you understand!- that made me hug the book) and another is between Colton and Norah, in which she tells him to find purpose in knowing that GOD created Him.
I am in a chaotic waiting season and these words ministered to my heart.
Cannot wait for Beckett’s story! Happy writing!
Blessings 🙂
Author
Hi Maria-Clara! Oh, I’m so happy you loved From the Start…that is SO fun to hear!! And I love that there were conversations in both books that resonated with you. With almost every book, when I get to conversations like the two you mentioned, it ends up being the moment when I realize why God has me writing the book…I always end up feeling like that’s the message God is trying to communicate with me and so he took me through the entire process of writing the book to get to that point! So when other people resonate with the same things, it’s very cool!
And yay, I’m excited that you’re excited for Beckett’s story too! It’s coming along really well!
Beautiful thoughts today, Melissa! What an uplifting, encouraging post! Love seeing how God’s working in your life. 🙂
Author
Thanks so much for stopping by, Cynthia! This was one of those blog posts that ended up surprising me. It’s definitely not what I started out intending to write, but man, I think my heart needed that spiritual jolt…that reminder of how amazing God’s love really is!
Thanks for this post! I started reading expecting a post much like it sounds like you initially planned to write. I would’ve been happy with that, but the turn the post took is so good. How encouraging to me as an aspiring novelist. Also, I appreciate the glimpse of the process that went into writing this post. What an inspiration for me to think about the best perspective and message to use in my blog posts, too 🙂
Author
Oh, thank you, Emily! I’m glad it was encouraging. And yeah, the process of writing this particular blog post was definitely an interesting one. It’s rare I write an entire post and then delete the whole thing. LOL! But I just felt like God was saying, “Dude, Melissa, this time…skip the nice little lesson. There’s a bigger truth here!” 😀
Absolutely beautiful! Thank you for sharing with us!
Author
And thank YOU for reading, Annie!
Melissa,
I can’t describe how much I love this beautiful, honest post, and the hope you’ve crammed in here. Thank you for sharing your heart, your experience, and a reminder that God’s timing is just right and we can trust Him.
Love,
Kerry
Author
Oh, thank you, Kerry! I’m so glad you appreciated the post. <3 <3 <3
Beautiful, Melissa. Thank you for sharing what was on your heart and listening to that nudge in your spirit. This post is exquisitely filled with hope and cherished truth!
Author
Thank you, Amanda! I feel like so often, I blog to process my own thoughts…what’s on my heart. So it’s extra wonderful when it happens to resonate with other people, too.
Hi Melissa,
Your post is really beautiful and I’d also add inspiring. I’ve always known that God was there for me and had a special plan for me, but only recently I’ve started to accept His choices. I’m a thirty-something girl that still struggles to find her place in the world, but I know that I’m not alone! 🙂
Love your books, by the way! Haven’t read From the Start yet but I loved all the other stories I’ve read. Keep writing!! 😉
Author
From one thirty-something girl to another…thank you so much for stopping by! I’m really glad you found it inspiring. Gotta be honest: I definitely have those “struggling to find my place” times, too. It tends to happen in random, sudden waves…
But God is amazing about giving us the reminders we need…just when we need them most. And that reminder that, like you said, we’re not alone…man, it’s a good one. 🙂
Beautiful lesson post, as always, Melissa. Thanks for sharing this fun post (i.e., how your books came to be) and turning it into a lesson. Love this sort of wisdom and advice. 🙂