A glimpse into the heart of the God I don’t always get.

220px-Absalom_Baird

<– OK so I was looking for some sort of depiction of Absalom from the OT for this post and instead came across this…a photo of Absalom Baird, who was apparently a Union general in the Civil War. Two things that were SO funny to me about this: 1) Absalom in the Bible was all proud of his hair. BUT look at this Absalom’s hair? Specifically his beard. Apparently hair is a thing with all Absaloms! 2) How do you think his last name is pronounced? I reeeally want it be pronounced like “beard.” I just feel SO good about this random photo find… 

All right…on to the actual post now.

*****

There’s really nothing that makes me go “WHAAAT??” like the Old Testament.

It just does. I’ve been sloooowly trekking through it recently and I’m camped out in 2 Samuel right now. And for the record, dude, I think I’ve always sort of considered killing Goliath the climax of David’s life. But yeah…no.

Anyhow, on this latest read of the OT I can’t count how many times I’ve found myself doing a mental, “Really, God?”

And I don’t mean that disrespectfully. I simply, honestly, don’t understand why God does and commands and condones some of what he does in chapters about armies and nations wiping each other out. Some of it doesn’t seem to match up with the view of God we get in the New Testament.

And yet…he’s the same God.

Often I think one of the great keys of life as a Christian is being able to say “I don’t know.” Not in a passive way that refuses to ask or face or ponder the hard questions. But in thoughtful, humble show of acceptance that there are some things I’m never going to get. Doesn’t mean we stop thinking. Does mean we choose to be okay with an unsolved divine mystery now and then.

All that said, though, I love when we get glimpses of God’s heart in Scripture…especially when those glimpses sneak into the strangest of stories.

Like what I read this week in a chapter about David’s banished son Absalom. The Bible doesn’t say this, but I’m going to guess he’s the person for whom the word “jerk” was invented. The guy tries to take over his father’s kingdom and kill his dad and he’s super vain about his hair.

Even so, in 2 Samuel, David actually wants to welcome his son back. He just needs a push. And he gets it in the form a visit from someone we only know as “the woman from Tekoa.” And about midway through this lady’s slightly dramatic speech, she says this:

All of us must die eventually. Our lives are like water spilled out on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again. But God does not just sweep life away; instead, he devises ways to bring us back when we have been separated from him.

There, in the middle of an account about the king and his upstart son and the woman who played mediator (and oddly, was instructed not to wear any cosmetics while talking to the king…?), we get a peek into God’s heart.

The heart of a father longing for his children’s return.

And the God who didn’t sweep his would-be banished creation away…but instead found a way to bring us back to him.

I just love that.

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    Comments 18

    1. Well, of course it’s pro-nounced baird, y’all. As in, he betta snip a bit of baird off so’s he can sip his tea. 🙂

      This year will be the 9th time I’ve read through the Bible, and I’ve experienced the same thoughts and questions you have Melissa. But one thing that always gets me is how over and over Israel sinned and over and over God took forgave them. That and how God saw David, a murderer and adulterer, as a man after His own heart. That means there’s hope for me.

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        Haha, love your pronunciation and sentence usage of Baird. 🙂

        And yes, I love how God calls David a man after his own heart…especially after a fresh reading of David’s life. It comforts me to know that someone who messed up in some pretty huge ways could earn that title from God…and like you said, means there’s hope for us.

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    3. I’m with ya on the “Whaat?” part. Both in the OT and in everyday life, there are times when I don’t understand facets about God’s character and his choices. But one of the things I LOVE about the OT is getting to see God’s redemptive heart. It stirs something in me. Something that girds me with hope in the faithfulness and father-heart of God even when my circumstances are challenging to reconcile. Thanks for another reminder of his pursuit. 🙂

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    4. I recently went back and read through David’s life and I had the same thought: wow, there was so much more to David’s life than defeating Goliath. And I found it so strange when reading Absalom’s story that David ran from his son, who wanted to destroy his father and remove him from the throne (AFTER killing his brother [by the way, that’s a weird story too]) and David was ready to welcome him back. But it revealed so much about David’s heart toward his children–and God’s heart toward us. There is no person, no mater how vile their actions, that God would not welcome back if they turned to Him. That’s amazing.

      And, love the Civil War picture! 🙂 In my recent research I’ve seen quite a few of those. I love how something so popular at one time looks so terrible now. Makes me wonder what our descendants will say about us! 🙂

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        I know! The whole Absalom thing is crazy…but you’re right, seeing both David’s and God’s heart in this story is pretty amazing.

        And oh my goodness, I already look back at some old pictures of me with ridiculous hair and think, really?? REALLY? So I can’t imagine a hundred years from now…

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    5. First, the start of your post made me giggle. Like, seriously.

      Second, yes! God is all about us coming back to him. And he’s willing to let us walk through a heck of a lot if it means, in the end, that we will.

      And I think it’s a very good thing to never stop questioning. Sometimes, we won’t always have an answer. But if we stop asking altogether, we become complacent. Stuck. And I don’t want that for my life.

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    8. That picture is just great. 🙂
      And yes, there are so many times I read the Bible and think WHAA? God is indeed amazing and just, but I just don’t understand some of the things he does, like you mentioned. But that just makes me want to dig into it more to figure out what I’m supposed to be learning!!
      Love this post and thanks for making us think deeper. 🙂

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        Glad I’m not the only one with the “WHAT?!” reaction. As confused as I get sometimes, though, by some of that stuff…it also comforts me. Because if I could figure out God and understand EVERY move he made, well, he wouldn’t be much of a God, would he? Not that I think that’s an excuse for not wrestling with some of the harder faith questions…but at the end of the day, there’s something calming about believing God knows what he’s doing even if I don’t get it. 🙂

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    9. Great post, Melissa. Love those nuggets in scripture. They show us life. What courage it took for that woman to talk to him! I’m going to look it up!

      Rachel

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